What The Knife

Shirt: TJ Maxx   trousers: H&M   shoes: gifted   bag: thrifted

I’m pretty sure that I married an axe murderer (have you seen that movie, because I grew up on that amazing piece of glory, If you haven’t seen it speedily repent and go watch its cheesiness) okay no but really. I’m genuinely concerned. I keep finding weapons all over the house. Last night I was making the bed (what do you really think I’m one of those people that makes the bed right when I get out of it? That stuff is for chumps) and guess what I found underneath the decorative pillows, a giant knife. Then I was grabbing a check from Matt’s sock drawer, another great and spacious knife, and guess what I happened upon when I went to set the alarm clock….another friggin’ knife. Surprise. So I became genuinely concerned, I mean if there are plans to have a knife throwing contest or if there are plans to replace every item in this house with a knife I should know right?? I mean right?! So I approached the Sir Matt and I was like, “What’s up with the millions of knives randomly stowed around the house, because if you’re going to kill me in my sleep I want to know about it.” and Matt, just nonchalantly looked up from his lap top and said, “Sarah, if someone comes into this house I want to know that I have at least four back up knives aside from the one I sleep with under my pillow.” ----cricket cricket---“You don’t sleep with a knife under your pillow. I would know, I make the bed.” “Oh yeah, I put it there every night before I go to sleep.” ----cricket cricket----. “Ummmm kay I’m going to bed. Sleep tight, don’t let the burglars bite.”  Guys, is this a normal man thing? Or should I be concerned that I’m going to wake up less two fingers and a baby toe?